Sewing Circle

Yes, yes, I know it has been forever since I have posted.  Between Canadian visitors & general life nonsense, I haven't had the time and/or motivation.  But I am here, so listen up:

For a long time, I didn't think I liked girls.  I thought they were annoying & catty and I felt like I could have more, unscrutinized fun with my guy friends.  But it's not the same.  We need that bond between women b/c at the end of the day, who else are you going to complain about your significant other to or laugh about lady problems and terrible sexual experiences with?  Plus, guys can be tough to be friends with b/c sometimes they are too conscious of the fact you are a woman.  Like they belittle your problems or leave you out or try to slip you the One Eyed Willie.  Uncomfortable, no?  So here are some reasons I love the ladies I love:

1) They make me laugh.  I do not enjoy people in general if they do not have a good sense of humor.  The more I ponder on that quality & the people who have come & gone from my life, the more I understand what that really means.  It's not just that they can make funny jokes or faces, but they don't take themselves too seriously and can find the humor in everyday situations.  They are the people I can travel with and know that when shit hits the fan, after we are done being assholes to each other, we will laugh it off.  Nor are all their jokes mean-spirited observations about others.  I learned from my mom at a young age that you're not funny if you're humor is being mean, anyone can do that so sit on it and spin.

2) They are not your run-of-the-mill gossipy back-stabbers.  Even though we may have our own little competitions & squibbles between us, they genuinely want to see me succeed and I hope the same for them.  They stick up for me & admire me for my qualities, the good & the questionable, and vice versa.  They just want to be my friend and spend time with me and be there for me, plain & friggin' simple.

3) They are themselves no matter the situation or how hard they try not to be.  They snort, they tell crazy long stories, they talk awkwardly loud in quiet situations, they have big laughs, they get grumpy or bossy at their scheduled times or they stand by what & who they believe in.  And I love them for it.  This goes hand in hand with their sense of humor, but I admire them for their ability to be themselves and never apologize for it.  Or they are themselves and they do apologize and then keep on keepin' on, because, really, who has time to sit around and be a boring robot that everyone can get along with but has the personality of a box?  They are just genuine beauties through & through.

4) They defy traditional expectations and make up their own rules.  Whenever people try to pin them down as one thing, they prove they can be something completely different.  And they bust their butts.  Gotta love those ambitious & self-reflexive people.

Basically, what constitutes a woman I want to hang out with is what constitutes a guy I want to hang out with.  But us ladies can be our own worst enemies which is what gives us a bad rep on both sides of the table.  We keep ourselves down by talking trash & being ugly when there is no real motivation for it.  We let those judgmental freaks make us feel bad about ourselves when they are just insecure.  And we buy into the stupid societal expectations when we need to own who we are and do what works for us, so long as it isn't hurting anyone else in the process.

Like this.  Don't do this.

But there's another side to that too, we need guys to quit staring at their own cocks for two seconds.  No, really, it's pretty unfair how harsh men can be about women's humor or ideals or past times when most of the time, they aren't that different than theirs.  I've said it before & I'll say it again: the only way for us to break this gender barrier is to raise strong and open minded women AND men.  Women & men: have that confidence, follow your dreams and when & if you decide to be in a relationship, make sure you and your partner are working towards an EQUAL compromise.  Don't hate on the opposite sex, listen to what they have to say and hold each other accountable.  Both sides deserve respect and we need to quit worrying about what makes a "man" or a "woman" and worry more about what makes a "human".  So I love both sides, don't get me wrong, but quit generalizing.  You sound like an ignorant prick or bitch and you aren't any better than the superficial girls or douche guys you like to belittle.

So I got a little out of hand on this one and it is more serious than funny, but until I moved away, I didn't realize just how important those female friendships have been in my life and how important they still are.  So keep in touch with the downass womenfolk out there, support them, and ignore those nasty wenches out there that make you self-conscious.  They're the ones losing in the end.



peace, love & sunshine,

bunny